Small victories

   They say Rome was not built in a day, well neither was my weight or my sons fear of a baseball. The past day has brought two proud moments as a mom and for myself. Austin began bball season this year with an attitude that "I cannot do this, I am going to quit." This all stemmed from hit being hit by a ball early on in the season. Coach promised him that if he ever even brushed him again there would be ice cream involved as a way of saying sorry. As his mom, knowing that any injury cannot be treated lightly, I had to hold my ground and keep making him go and try hard to keep him practicing. Last night made it all worth it, every whine and cringe moment. I along with his coaches tried hard the past couple weeks just to work on his confidence and  get him comfortable just with the ball coming near him. Something clicked in him the past couple games and the whining turned into when is our next game, I cannot wait to play. Last night when I told him to start getting ready he very quickly got himself dressed and was ready to go. Wow, this is great.
   I had to drop the boys off and head to another field with SaraAn because I help coach her team, so I had to go with her. Upon returning, I was quickly approached and asked if I would have a problem with Austin catching. CATCHING? The ball coming right towards him? I was not too sure, but seeing his face and the excitement he had, I could not say no, as long as he was protected, which he was and always is. I asked the coach how he did when I was gone, and I had to almost wipe a tear when he told me that he hit the first time and got out later when running to second, but the next bat he hit a DOUBLE, wow, are you sure we are talking about Austin, not Henry, who plays on the same team. They assured me they were talking about Austin and told me how excited he was when he hit that far. I was excited for him and felt a litttle dissapointed that I was not there to see it. At least his grandma and aunt were there though.I did see him hit a third time and he had a great hit, but got out on first. I was a very proud mom last night and I feel that these little things to some people are HUGE to me and all that know his story I am sure know why.
  On now to my proud moment tonight. As my last post, I shared about my goals on weight loss and my new journey on weight watchers. I followed my points and learned a lot this week about portion control and self control. There were many tempting moments, but I had to remember why I was doing this and that the cravings will one day not feel so strong. I also kept myself busier than usual by trying the more advanced Zumba class at the gym to just doing things around the house to keep my mind off food. For instance, this would be a typical need a snack time, but since I am here writning, I do not feel hungry at all. At the meeting tonight they talked about excuses and what is the core behind them. I know what mine are and a lot do stem from my past, but I am willing to go past that and make this change. I have lived my whole life with my father in my face telling me I am an embarrasment and will never amount to nothing Well guess what, he was wrong and I am beginning to see that more each day. It has taken me a long time even though I have no relationship with him, to just let it go, and I feel that is what I need to do  if I am going to succeed in this journey. Well, anyway, I am closing this blog 8 POUNDS LIGHTER tonight. I feel very good about this and I hope all my hard work will pay off in the end, but for now those baby steps towards a new me.