Boys, washington, and waffles

       Last Saturday found me with the two boys on a  full bus heading to Washington D.C. with the cub scouts. I was really out numbered, I had both boys by myself while all the other boys had one on one with a parent or had more then one person with them. I was feeling a little anxious. Me with two boys both with ADHD, one with Aspergers and the other one with  all his problems and ready to lose a tooth so I had to come prepared with his meds just incase of any injury or problem on the trip. WOW!! seems like a lot to just go on a trip to a place I along with them have never been before. Nervousness about the day kept my brain crazy the whole ride down.
      When there we set our plans for the day, a lot of walking, we were then on our own to do what we wanted till 4:30. For Henry we started at the Air and Space museum, a long walk to begin, Austin whining the whole time that his legs hurt, what did I get myself into? Once inside he of course was fine and got involved in some activities. since there was soo much we wanted to do we were on a time limit and it come quick, Henry impressed some of the workers with this knowledge on certain subjects and his knowledge of some spacecraft and planes. Imagine that.
    Now after another walk we came to the Natural history museum where the boys let the world know they know their anatomy while looking at the neanderthal and primordial people and statues. I ended up with a very red face and quickly had to redirect them to another part of the museum. I am glad they know the proper words for parts of the body, but did not need them to loudly acknowledge their brillance on the subject. Only my boys. Now it was a little after lunch and we wanted to go see Fords Theater and find the Subway restaurant that was on the map across the street.
  Another long walk found us in front of Fords Theater, this made Henry happy. Could not find the Subway. The boys however found across the way Lincoln's Waffle House. If anybody knows my boys they will know they LOVE waffles, so guess where we had to go for lunch. The place was a little crammed, but the boys faces said it all they loved their waffles and it made them both very happy and ready for another journey.
   Another long walk took us to Washington Monument, they were amazed by its height and we then proceeded to keep walking and find ourselves at the Vietnam Vet memorial that was requested by the boys menah(grandmom) to visit for pop pop's sake. They were a little confused why it was there, but they looked intently at it and the names and kept asking a lot of questions. Now right around the corner we saw Lincoln Memorial and the boys kept pushing me to go all the way up the steps, I kept looking and was not thrilled to do so, but Henry grabbed my hand and said "mommy I will help you", how could I say no to that gesture. I made it, impressed with myself that I did not collapse yet or my feet did not fall off. Down the steps we went and now off to the White House.
    Now the boys were showing signs of fatigue and I was getting pretty tired, but they wanted to keep on and go the extra couple of blocks to the White House. We were able to just see it from across the street, just enough to make Henry happy that he saw it. Now approaching 4:00 we started to head back so we could use the potty and get ready for the trip home. On the ride home there was a lot of excitement at first then tired finally hit most of the kids and adults except for Henry. Henry's brain was so overloaded by the days events that he could not settle down despite much effort on my part for the sake of others. He had sooo much to talk about and soo many things in his head and he needed to get it all out. I felt pretty sorry for the kids and adults trying hard to rest on the way home, even though there was nothing I could do about it.
  Finally home, the boys went to bed quickly, I was exhausted in a good way. At the end of it all felt pretty good about myself because I did it despite all the anxiety at the beginning. What a good day, my boys, Washington, and waffles.

Mega Mountains

   As I sit and realize I should be sleeping right now all I want to do is just vent. The past few weeks have been a struggle for me, craziness at work, extra hours to try to help finances a little since gas keeps climbing and the kids are always hungry, messes all around the house, and never ending problems with the kiddos. As I look back a little more then 10 years ago, I think nothing could of prepared me for the ongoing problems with the kids. I love them so much and always have put their needs in front of mine, but I am telling you some days are hard to manage without feeling like a good cry. If I could just add up the ever mounting hours spent in dr's and specialists, therapists , and the ever exhausting hours at Childrens Hospital of Philadelphia, I know it is all worth it for the sake of my babies. I have put so much of me aside from nowadays sleep, going to the gym, to just reading a book or watching the tv in hopes that my children will grow and be without their issues. I know that their issues will never be "cured", but at the same time I have done everything in my being to help them with all areas of their lives. Somedays though I still feel like I have failed them and myself.  I suppose some people will look at this as a pity me party , but I am doing this so others may feel that they are not alone in the battle to help their children achieve their highest goals.
     Henry, the oldest with aspergers, tourettes, and adhd has been our problem child lately. Some figure it is early stages of puberty, others think there is more to it. Back to therapy for him so he can help control his anger and now today hearing the word bi polar brought tears to my eyes. Could it be, it does make a lot of sense since there is a very high probable family history. We are going to try the medication route with a lot of support from his school and a new therapist. I hate as his mother to see him so anguished and so angry all the time over the stupidest things, but this is where his aspergers comes into plasy that he cannot process things the way normal kids do. WOW!! A double wammy it seems. New meds beginning tomorrow with a likely chance of seeing some difference within the next couple weeks.
      My little warrior,( they call her in karate) SaraAn will be spending some of the day at the hospital tomorrow for some more gi studies. Vomiting episodes have hit all time high 3-4 per week for over 4 weeks now. She is already on so much medication to control her asthma, reflux,and allergies. I have that mothers intiution that something is just not right for this to be going on this long. Seems endless and I am not even done. This is the little one that has fought for her life since the day she was born. I thought her near three week stay in the NICU at birth was one of the scariest moments of our lives, who would of ever thought it did not end there. I will further write about her at another time.
    To top the cake Austin who has hemophilia and another blood clotting disorder is ready to lose 4 teeth. Oh, please do not bleed. The meds are ready if any problems, but I am a nervous wreck. I am checking his teeth everyday to see how wiggly they are. He tells me "mom, just stop already". Maybe he is right, the insightfullness of a 6 year old. Try to convince me everything will be alright. Thanks to my little group of hemophilia friends who said it should not be that bad.
   As my ramblings come to an end and sleepiness is catching up to me, I needed to get this all out for some reason or another. I have been told over and over that God will not give me more then I can handle, some days I just want to laugh at that statement, but as I look at the whole picture I know with a lot of prayer it will all work out in the end. This is just another test of strength for me and I have NEVER been a failure to my children and do not plan on starting now. Updates to come. Thanks for reading.